Chinese president Xi Jinping has been traveling Washington State for the last three days, and during his visit to Seattle, he made an announcement the dropped the jaws of Washingtonians.
WCNN - Reporter General
President Jinping's visit to the Northwest was clearly a show of power as his motorcade blocked the main corridor of the region, Interstate 5, several times for no apparent reason. Jinping's travel itinerary is illustrated below.
During the many speaking engagements, Jinping made several comments that all ended with the same overall message:
"Wree took yrour jrobs hra hra hra!"
Jinping was met with many protesters, as expected, since Seattle's third largest employer is Professional Protestors Inc., a for profit firm in the business of extorting business and government out of money to shut them up.
China is bunch of dicks. We are so angry at world and world stuff and we need stop taking over everything. We have such small penis and this makes us mad all time. The army going to use better tactics to be more nice and that why we in Seattle. Army asking help of large gay community to teach China people in army how to use non-lethal dick sucking methods like National Guard use. All China military going to have gun still but not going to use. Going to use mouth to suck penis instead. First country ever to do this and we best country for doing this. That is fact. Any American wanting to join better country can be in army and live in China and learn to suck penis good.
Seattle Mayor, Ed Murray, has already issued a letter of resignation and renounced his citizenship to join the "New" Chinese Army.
The announcement may have opened new doors and has placed new light on the impression American's have toward China. Right wing conservatives have already started boycotting their favorite store Wal-Mart in protest.
"We done did know that most of the crap we buy in Wal-Mart is made in Japan, but we didn't care until they started acting like fags." one disgruntled shopper told CNN in Mississippi.
Time will tell how this news will impact foreign relations with China, but the outlook is better now than it was before. The Pope, who is currently meeting with President Obama in Washington D.C. has canceled his public appearance with Jinping and asked for a private engagement with him.
The following pictures were provided to the media after the press conference: